Hey You. Yes, You There in the Distance

Hey You. Yes, You There in the Distance

By Shannan Humphrey

Hey You. Yes, You There in the Distance – How have you been? Really? Listen I know this is kind of forward and kind of intrusive at the same time but uh how have you really been?

Now I know we haven’t seen each other in a bit but how are you in there? Past the  smile. Past the words that you speak to those you don’t really want to know.

Look you don’t have to tell me. Just let me ask you a few questions. Is it as good as you hoped it would be?

Has it all been worth it? You know the trade?

What did it cost you?

Have you found the fulfillment that you sought?

Is it as good as they said it would be?

Now that you’re here is it really what you wanted?

When you go to sleep each night do you love being you? Are you satisfied with who you have become?

Yes, I can hear all the retorts, they fill the silence with words. How many responses? How many justifications? How many words do you have written on the shield that you’re hiding behind?

You think I’m impressed by your pictures, your posts, your vacations, your ride, your earthen accomplishments. Oh, how I wish I could be happy for you. And maybe you truly are. Happy I mean. Are you?

You think I haven’t been there? Behind my shield? Hiding. For far too long. It’s my only regret.

I wanted to be real, I wanted to be authentic, but it was never safe to be back then. I was scared to tell my secrets. I was scared to tell them that I was scared. Are you scared?

Has fear gripped you so much that you try not to even think about it. How long have you avoided the truth? I know what that’s like, I experience it every day. I recognize it because I lived in it for too many years.

Are you in those fears again in another year? Why celebrate this one, nothing is going to change?

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Regards, Shan

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Shannan Humphrey

Shan

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